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summer ta-da! list;

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listen to cape cod kwassa kwassa while at cape cod.

take millie, the bike, down to the cape.

buzz my head. oh whoops. did that.

plan epic road trip.  (any good books i should download on my kindle for the trip? is it sad that this is my main concern?)**

concerts concerts concerts. regina spektor. the kooks. cake. two door cinema club. santigold. jukebox the ghost. laura marling.

take trapeze classes.

more swing and contra dancing.

rock climbing at m.i.t.

visit vermont= i’ve officially been to all of the northeastern states. and caused mayhem in all of them.
(that time i fell off crotched mountain in new hampshire. that time i bought chocolate wine at a quidditch retreat in maine. that time i pretended i dated someone who went to brown in rhode island. that time i forged an unlikely friendship with a boston squirrel.)

lavender lemonade + sangria drinking on the stoop. on the beach. on the curb. in a boat. in a house. in a tree. sam i am, i love sangria and lemonade. yeah.

decaffeinate myself (lolwhoops @ my iced turkish coffee + tweaking out hardcore at wired puppy).

pet all the bostonian puppies. all of them.  i think i’ve said “sorry to interrupt you, but i have to pet this dog really quick” to a friend at least 12 times. i even did that in the middle of a date. so, this is a very possible goal.

*ta-da! lists, like to-do lists but without all the dread! trademark mackenzie filson 2007-2012.

** also, if you’d like to do a guest post while i am in the midst of my travels down the east coast it would be much appreciated! email me at mackenzie{dot}filson{at}gmail{dot}com for info.

{berets and bongos} 67;

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Pinned Image

“ ‘i feel there is an angel in me’ she’d say
‘whom I am
constantly shocking”

-lawrence ferlinghetti.

excuse me, is this mic on;

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{almost exactly a year ago.}

if you haven’t noticed it, my favorite tag for posts recently is “that’s why i’m single”.

it originated in my junior year of high school. it started as a game to (somehow?) get my bff over a really turdish ex-boyfriend of hers (who once yelled at me for offering him a homemade cookie, a real catch). whenever any of us did something horridly embarrassing or unattractive, we’d say in a sing-songy voice, “that’s why you’re siiiiingle!”.

the friend eventually got over the dude, we lost a lot of shame, and we still play the game to this day. it’s become harder and harder to top each other on being just completely undesirable (conventionally speaking, obviously. because come on, weirdness is the spice of the dating world)

but guys, i think i won.

i was reorganizing my new bookshelf (don’t say it, i already know) i found a random journal i wrote some notes down in last year. i found a gem to win all the games of “that’s why you’re single. i’d also like everyone to know that right above this gem is a post-it note that has “TRISH, THE CURSING CROSS-STITCHER” written on it in gel pen, which i assume was a character i was trying to develop. i rest my case.

so without further ado, a white girl rap (my favorite canon is it sad that this isn’t my first one?) from exactly 361 days ago. it doesn’t get any more (conventionally) undesirable than this:

white girl rap, take two. 
yo, yo check it. 
i got my vera bradley and my skinny jeans 
my skin ain’t white, it’s oxi-clean.
all these other bitches be tryna’ start a fight
but i ain’t got time, bachelorette’s on tonight.

these haters think they know me
think they know my life.
but do they really know about my white girl strife?

split ends, cracked iphones, liberal arts colleges,
daddy issues, veganism, boys that won’t acknowledge us!
now get this, being a white girl is hard
we have to update our blogs and try not to fart

pretend to be vegan and stop eating gluten
crushes on “bad boys” and have opinions on putin.
and now here’s my home girl, D(J.Crew), 
my brooks brother from another mother and her palomino, boo. 
 

goodness gracious.

the concert bug;

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{because i am obsessed. and because this video is amazing}

i am a very faithful person. i can listen to the same song for days on end (it’s the only way i can write, to be honest. meaning i have listened to “simple song” over 300 times, yes). i obsessively have to make every concert for every band i’ve relentlessly listened to, even if i haven’t listened to them since i had braces, a live journal account, or wore snarky, cartoon-y wristbands from hot topic.

concerts and music, as i’ve found, are another reason why i’m 99% sure i am not a dirty hipster. phew. rather than feel a false sense of pride over knowing that band eons before you did, i’m SUPER pumped you listen to them too, so that way we can dance in annoyingly wide circles in a crowd of strangers at a concert for that band. and braid each other’s hair. and talk about boys. i mean, go to more concerts. yes, that.

i know now that when (not “if”! positive thinking! empowerment! believing in myself! yay!) i write books for people to read, it would be silly to not include a cd that captures the mood of the book in itself. right now i’m writing the nubs and giblets of what will become my bfa thesis for next year. i have a title (“i’m allergic to you, and other misadventures”). 98 pages of awkward stories. and a playlist of 24 songs that capture the stories’ feelings (okay, maybe i am a dirty hipster). i daydream often of giving my 200 (hopeful) page thesis to my advisor and as i close the door to his office i say ,”oh, there’s a cd taped to the back cover, too.”

and the daydream also ends in my advisor loving the josh ritter tracks on the cd a lot and we dance in circles at one of his concerts. and talk about boy (non-fiction authors). and braid hair (in a non-literal sense).

because i’m not a dirty hipster, listen to these gems:
“to the dogs or whoever (live from juan’s basement)”
“change of time” 
 (amazing video as well)
“good man” 

it’s official;

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yes, lady-friends and man-friends, it is true.

on june 28th, i will be embarking on a trip of my dreamz~*

no lie, only i would find it dreamy to travel for three weeks on a bus (said my mother, to me, on the phone last night as i spoke to her about the prospects of taking baby-wipe showers on the train).

but haters gonna hate,  from massachusetts to florida i shall go. with my mustard-colored boots, a go-get-’em attitude, and (most likely) a frightening case of bus ride-induced  b.o.

the itinerary is as follows:

new york city:
june 28th-july 1st.= pretty libraries. street-performers. lush grasses to prance on and pet city puppies.

philly:
july 1st-4th= brewskis with my broskis, and smothering my little nephew with keeses.

washington, d.c.:
july 4th-10th= my two friends are subletting a place above georgetown cupcakes (score), and prancing abouts the district with maya.

durham, n.c.:
july 10th-13th= seeing my old homeland, exploring duke gardens (haven’t been there since i was a wee-little kenzie.)

charleston, s.c.:
july 13th-july 17th= drinking all the mimosas and wearing straw hats on the beach with staceface.

atlanta, ga:
july 18th-20th= no idea! which is the best part of any road trip. most likely eating peachy things.

gainesville, fl.:
july 20th-22nd= swing dancing ’til the early morning with my platonic soul mate, kelli +causing a general amount of ruckus.

orlando.:
until the end of august! yay! homeland! gonna swim in all the lakes and  eat all the oranges!

any advice? playlists? friendly truck/bus-drivers i could befriend along the way? people to eat things with? things to do in these cities? ways to make me smell like a flower at all times?

a maine itinerary;

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fall in love with maine.

resolve to move there immediately.

that is all, folks, for maine is quite the ladykiller.

edit: and yes, that is chocolate wine and sparklers….when in maine…?

i am overflowing;

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the other day i was sitting in my bed, smelling my new ikea lingonberry candle,  stomach full of “swedish” cinnamon rolls. and i started shaking a bit.

my whole body was buzzing, not even from my new-found caffeine addiction.

or high fructose corn syrup lovingly dolloped atop the cinnamon rolls.

i was just so overcome with how fantastic everything is.

ta ta for now;

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loljk. i wish. but the first part of this picture is very, very true. i’m off to maine for the weekend!

and yes, this trip is quidditch related.
and yes, it is a quidditch retreat for all new members of the executive board of the club.
and yes, i do wonder how i sleep at night.
but yes, i do know this is probably why i am single. no regrets.

but until then, have a lovely weekend, dears!

my mother, the legend;

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my mom is a legend.
she tells the best dirty jokes.
she is constantly stopped by friends in the grocery store.
even when we are 30 miles away from home.
she once thought it was a good idea to put mayonnaise in a soup.
thus giving rise to our new favorite southern exclamation, “HOT BUBBLIN’ MAYONNAISE THAT’S AWESOME.”

she always makes sure stray dogs have a bed/yoga mat/ bit of cool tile to sleep on until we can find them a home.
and best of all, she is a world-class texter:

happy  mother’s day, “cletus”.

i am very glad you birthed me.

“i’ve got a perfect body ’cause my eyelashes catch my sweat”;

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realizing that my limbs aren’t just there to look nice is always an interesting lesson. realizing that, when i was seventeen, i never could relate to any of the “real girl” models in seventeen magazine and being okay with it. they never had tips that suited my short pixie hair cuts that i gave myself in my garage on particularly humid floridian afternoons in july (and again when i was nineteen, whoops). all i can think about is how cool it is that my hair is just a bunch of long strands of dead protein.

realizing that the body does really cool things like convert just-eaten bananas to muscle and energy (i mean, it’s much more than that. but i digress) is far more fascinating than finding out what size pants your friend wears at forever 21 (and to those girls who actually inquire about your friends’ sizes, i just.. ijustdon’tunderstandyou).

to be quite frank, i’d much rather have my legs covered by my favorite pair of bike shorts on their way to a place they’ve never been before. or covered in mud. god, i could write a whole novel about how much i like mud and getting muddy. or stained by the grass. or sticky with accidental cherry-red popsicle stains from an intermission at contra dancing. my body does cool things every second of the day. even when i’m sleeping.

a few weekends ago i had the pleasure of biking the boston marathon route at midnight. my old roommate remarked half way through the ride, “man, mackenzie. you have very nice, long legs.” at first i was flattered. and then i wanted to say, “these legs just biked thirteen mile. that’s not the point?!” but then i stifled myself because i like to keep my angry fire breathing feminist dragon at bay. and because my mother always taught me to take a compliment.

it’s taken me a while to get to this point. it’s taken a lot of listening to regina spektor’s “folding chair” on repeat to solidify this idea that a perfect body is one that has eyelashes to catch sweat.  it’s taken a lot of eye-opening eve ensler ted talks like this one to realize that twenty year olds don’t need to feel bad about upper arm jiggle because it allows them to converse or relate with other twenty year old girls. i just want to shake those girls and say “your legs and torso GOT you to this clothing store. isn’t that amazing?!” to become disembodied from your own body is the saddest thing you can ever let happen. because really, i don’t even know what size i wear at forever 21, so why should you?

my body enjoys at least two cups of half-caf iced instant coffee a day with soy creamer. it doesn’t mind the feel and the history of thrifted clothing. it feels coziest on electric blankets, on a road bike going across the mass ave. bridge, and on my wooded floor when i have the time for my “diy-mani-pedi-’twilight zone’-viewing-hour”. it thrives off of new linguistic factoids, a new library book, a new route. if it could be described as any piece of clothing that i own, my body would be my knee-high mustard-colored boots.

it’s not here to look good. that’s not the point.

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